The continued waiting...

Well I still sit here waiting waiting. It is what we IVF patients do best I guess. Anyhow I am just enjoying the fact that I am for now preggo-I mean I know that there are embryos where they need to be and now I just sit and wait for the proof right? I am not having any symptoms really other than breast tenderness and feeling like I am going to bawl at every little thing! It is really bad but I dont know if it is just the hormones that I am taking or what...I will find out in 10 days though.

It seems that running around was the easy part for blood draws and ultrasounds and this just sitting around waiting is the hardest? Why is that? Oh well. I am trying to take it easy and just relax about it but that is easier said than done when it is a huge gamble basically. With my time and money. I know it will be worth it when I see the positive but until then I don't know.

The transfer

Well I had my transfer this AM. It went well. The RE said that things went perfect and we are hoping for a BFP as all get out. This waiting is so hard. It really is. These are the photos of my em-babies. I am so hoping that at least one of them decides to stick around for the long haul this time. I really want this to work. Obviously. Didnt I just say that? Oh well I am just talking out of no where really. I am left to my thoughts and my progesterone shots. LOL I did break down and buy some pee sticks! I know I know it may be early but I need to know that the trigger shot has left the building and that the embies are sticking in for a bit. I can't wait to see the double lines on the beautiful little stick! I know I am sick right? Oh well. Those are my thoughts for the moment. I have two long long weeks ahead of me. My beta is on the 24th. Ugghh. The 24th is an eternity away. Just an eternity.

Update

Well I went for my second IV Hespan today and it went well. No big problems to report and I got the fertilization report. 7 embryos growing well!!!! I am so happy about this. It is looking good for me. I am hoping that we will be back in on Friday for our transfer of two wonderful picture perfect embies! They will not look at them again until Wed afternoon when they change the media they are growing in. I can't wait to hear. I hope that I know before the end og the day but she said probably not until Thursday. Thats OK as long as I know what is going on!!! I must know ASAP!!! LOL that is just the controlling part of me. :) Oh I also got a note from the RE to be off of work all week! Woo Hoo I am off until Sunday night I think! That is the best news yet I can live a normal life until then. I am thrilled because I am still sore yet. This way I can just relax through the transfer. That will be great.

Well thoughts of possibly being pg are all consuming of my mind and my time right now. I try not to think about it but it just happens. It is so hard not to think about it. Will it work or wont it? I will be going to the store to buy some pee sticks after the transfer. I want to see what is going on as soon as it goes on and hopefully I will have some photos of positive to share. This time of uncertainty is really unreal. You have no clue unless you have been here in the 2WW with me. LOL I am still a little sore when I move about and I will be so thankful to rest good this week.

HCG shot and ER

The HCG shot was on Friday night and we only did the 5,000 units instead of 10, 000 units because of risk of OHSS. I have been pretty swollen lately. The RE recommended that I do the Hespan for 3 days IV. I decided after doing some research that it was a good idea to help reduce the risk of OHSS because my E2 was over 2800 last time....

ER- Well I did it and it went well! I guess they were able to get 12 mature eggs. I do not know anything else about the fertilization or anything. I did get an IV lock that is really annoying so that I don't have to be poked for my IV Hespan. I have to go and get it in the morning and then again Tuesday morning. I start my PIO and my suppositories on Tuesday as well. I am pretty sore tonight and I am looking forward to each day getting a little better. Not like I am dying in pain or anything just uncomfortable. I am so excited to see what is happening with my "babies"!!!! They do not disturb them at all after fertilization until day three. They will look at them and see how they are looking and grade them. I will not know when I am supposed to go in-as of right now they are planning on a 5 day transfer on Friday if they all look good on Wednesday. That is what we are hoping for anyway. I can't wait to hear something on how they are doing!!! My bbs are very sore from the high estrogen levels....Can't hardly move without soreness...Oh well. If I get my precious little surprise out of the deal then it is worth it right? I will update you when I know more this week.

Yesterdays Appointment

Well for me it feels like todays appointment due to the fact that I work at night but anyhow it went well. I have about 18 or so follies and they are looking good so I was able to trigger last night! Yeah! Tom did the shot about 9pm on the dot. I go in on Sunday for the ER. He is going so he can be a part of the procedure again. He just loved going in last time to get his jewels stabbed! He still teases about it. He says that his parts were the size of Texas!!! He is so funny. Such a good good man. So good to me. Anyhow back on track. Things are looking good and about 13 are above 16 mm and the nurse said that the other can catch up so we will just have to see. My left ovary is difficut to reach because of how it sits. They had trouble last time this happened as well. I hope that it will go into place on Sunday for ER. ET shoudl be on Friday the 11th. I start PIO (actually in ethyl oleate) on Tuesday-no estrace because mine was 2800. I will be on IV Hespan due to the high risk of OHSS. They do three IV infusions of it-Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. I hope that it works. I felt so bloated and crampy last time we did IVF. We are starting to get excited about things. Tom said he would really like a girl because we already have the boys....I don't really care and I am excited to get moving so I can POAS!!!!

Ultrasound/Bloodwork day

Well yesterday I went for my U/S and things are looking pretty good. As soon as the tech put the "magic wand" in I was immediately asking....how do they look. The anticipation was killing me. I was not feeling any different so I was thinking that possibly it was not working or something I mean shouldnt I be feeling like crap like the last time? Well I just had hours to wait. This morning I am feeling tight and slightly bloated. I know the feeling is coming back. I hate it but at least I know that something is going on. Anyhow my endo lining is 10.2 mm which I am told is good for this stage. I have 3 follies on the right that are 10-12mm and 8<9mm and on the left I had a 12mm follie and 8<9mm that she could see. The nurse called back and said that that is a good amount and growing at a steady pace. Good news for us!!! I have to continue with the Lupron Shot in the morning and the Bravelle 150 and Menopur 75 at night. I am so thrilled that it is working....

Although again I sit here and think will it work? will I miscarry? Will it work? Will I see the double red lines on the stick? Will it work? Will they call with the positive result? Did I mention WILL IT WORK?????? LOLOLOLOL Ok ok so I am out of control but the point is, is it is a freaking 1 month wait not 2WW. It is the 4WW!!! By the time you start and all. I don't know about anyone else but I need to know if it will work. I plan on POASing as soon as possible like from day one so I can tell that the HCG shot is out of my system and then wait for the real pg lines to show up. That is the plan anyhow!!! Well thats it for now. Time to attack my day and get some rest~!

Medication Time

Well I had an ultrasound and blood work done today. Just to make sure that those ovaries are nice and quiet. Things are looking good and the nurse called and said to start the medications! Woo Hoo! Bring it on. I started with 5 units of Lupron in the AM and 150 of Bravelle/Gonal F and 75 of Menopur in the PM. Fun fun. I am really hoping that this is all worth it and that I end up with a big huge BFP at the end. That will be the exciting part. Tom went with me today to be a support person. He is such a great guy. I really love him and he is a great friend.

Lots of medications and a confusing calendar. I will let you know what is going on as it happens. I go in on Friday AM for more blood work and another follicle check. Grow follies Grow!!!